Colorectal Exam Whoa Boy!

Bill's colonoscopy results...

Although I wouldn’t call this fun, I would say it was an adventure.  A special thanks to Deborah Savage, my good friend, that got up extremely early to come pick me up and take me to my “procedure”, wait in the waiting room, and then hang around with me for several hours afterwards as we visited a museum, had lunch and perused a nick-nacks shop.

The two uncomfortable things about the whole thing were drinking a large amount of “flush” to clean out my system before the actual procedure.  The chemicals give the liquid (mixed with water) a heavy water texture.  Not at all palatable.  They suggest chilling the liquid in the refrigerator before starting to down it.  I agree, because “warm” it would have been even less tasty.

The other discomforting element was having an IV stuck in the vein in the top of your hand.  I had this done when I was in the hospital having my knee surgery about 20 years ago and it just sort of burns mildly.

But, you don’t talk long with the doctor, either before the procedure, or after you wake up.  They knock you out and it’s over and done before you know anything.  I do recall waking up partially during the procedure.  No pain!  I moved my left hand, and the anesteologist grabbed it quickly.  I recall looking up at the television screen and being vaguely aware of the picture on it at the time.  I went right back out into never never land and awoke about 20 – 30 minutes after everything was over, and I had been moved to a recovery area.  It took me a short while to figure out that the reason there was no clock on the wall was that I was in a different area.  But the drugs had me in such a docile state that it was a pleasant recovery.  I recall thinking that I would rehearse the little Italian I had recently learned as a means to regain my mental faculties.  I counted the few numbers I knew, skipping some that I was unsure of.  I said Chao, Buongiorno, Buonasera, Chao a Presto, etc.  A nurse asked how I was doing, and the doctor came in a short time later and talked briefly with me.  He said there had been some polyps that had been removed and that they could develop into cancer (not WERE, but the kind, that if left alone might go rogue… like Palin).

I got dressed.  Looked at the mess on the sheets. and then the nurse came and they got a wheel chair for me to ride out to the car.  Every time they stopped the wheel chair, I attempted to get up, but was stopped by the nurse.